I wish I were a ring Upon my girlfriend's hand, 'Cause everytime she'd wipe her rear I'd see the promised land....

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Are these your eyes, I found them between my breasts!

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Hello!Im a little alien called Kan.I have taken the form of a mobile

phone- your phone.And during this message I have been having sex with

your thumb!

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I once had a ONE-2-ONE night with a VIRGIN.She teased me till i got an ERICKSON.sucked me till my face went ORANGE till i busted my load of SEIMEN over her NOKIAS.

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I hereby place u under arrest 4 violating code 69 - distracting public with ur xtreme good looks & sex appeal, remain silent & report 2 my bedroom.

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A man was looking at a painting 4 a long time of a naked woman with leaves covering the body, he was asked what he was doing & he answered - waitng 4 autumn.

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GUY: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. GAL: If I see you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

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I do not have the muscles of Stallone, I am not as handsome as Brad Pitt, I am not as strong as Schwarzenegger, but I can lick as good as Lassie!!!

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Its been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt N a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase N the handle came off. I'm afraid 2 go 2 the bathroom.

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American students say : people who never experience good sex and do not perform well in bed, usually read their SMS messages with their right hand.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: Wanna play *Magic*? She says: What's that? He says: We go to my place, have sex and than you disappear!

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A husband was asked: Do u talk to your wife after sex? His answer: Depends, if I can find a phone. Amitabh bachan in KBC

Question for 10 lac to Sardar jee

What is the colour of your wife's underwear?

Option 1 : White

Option 2 : Grey

Option 3 : Black

Option 4 : Blue

Sardar jee : Can i phone a friend?

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Sex is a sensation. It's about a man's temptation, putting his location in a

woman's destination. Do you understand the explanation or do you need a

demonstration?

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A peach is a peach,a plum is a plum,A kiss ain't a kiss without some tongue.So

open up your mouth and close you eyes and give your tongue some exercises!!